A perfect day of solitude
Jellyfish, gardens, and mornings full of stars
November 9, 2025
Admittedly I love solitude. It dovetails nicely with my growing desire to slow down.
Not that solitude infers some semblance of slowness. It doesn’t. It has however made me hyper aware of the way in which I use, channel, and ideally, enjoy my energy.
I adore people and being with others*, yet am quite at ease with being alone for long periods of time. This comfort made me realize that I think part of my definition of solitude is being able to observe, for the most part, in an uninterrupted fashion, how other beings and creatures, both animate and inanimate, move in, around, and through the world.
Upon further reflection, I thought, what would be my perfect day of solitude? How could I stretch it out, slow it down? Would it be similar to this day that I’m already halfway through, neither rapid or idle, just full?
In no particular order but definitely as balanced as possible, I’d make sure to have time inside and outside. I’d cook, likely three, proper meals for myself. I’d love on my cats and husband. Music, podcast, work, a very long walk, discover something new….and so on.
[The details] I’d wake up before sunrise. If anything, this is probably the most satisfying, regulatory action I will never disrupt. It’s powerful, rhythmic, and has a way of generating a particular tone that works well for me. Its effects drift into how I dream and when sleep beckons. It makes for a delightfully full morning. No matter the temperature, I’d go outside. It’s pretty much the first thing I do after my morning sameness: scraping my tongue, brushing teeth, splashing my face, eyes wide open, with cold water, and applying oil. It’s more about taking in any remaining stars and moon (phase dependent). And because the doorway leads me eastward, I’m able to sense the shift in light over the mountains. Often crisp and clear it is the language of my surroundings.
It not just gives context, it is the context.
Ceremoniously the coffee comes next. Maybe a candle and incense are lit. I drink a small cup without doing anything else. After breakfast I’d spend a couple hours tending the garden. Take a walk. Call a friend. World music rippling in the background.
I’m a big fan of a hot lunch for which I’m grateful I can regularly make. The afternoon hours, more so than the morning, I’d sit at my desk. I find these hours are my most productive for work and writing.
With the evening comes a settling in.
I’ve never distinguished cooking just for myself as polarizing or a burden. Even if it’s just me, I’m equally inspired to make homemade pasta, a pot of soup, or some kind of bubbling fruit crisp. I guess I have always been content to cook for myself as if I was cooking for others. There’s a pleasurable Zen in it. The movements are methodically comfortable and essential companions when in solitude.
Late in the evening I’d return to the garden once the sun had sunk behind the horizon. I find the following 30-40 minutes are some of the most magical minutes of the day. There’s an omnipresent glow, as though everything has an effervescence. The sky deepens into the most gorgeous unnamed hue of indigo. And the fragrances lure the larger night hovering pollinators.
I relish these dark hours prior to slipping into cool cotton sheets and opening a book.
Here’s the thing, I don’t consider solitude loneliness. The difference, in solitude I’m able to find within what most think will arrive from the outside. And that is far from being without love or resource.
What parts of this day would I deem slow? None of it, and at the same time all of it.
A quick google search renders an interesting definition of slow living or how at least the current collective deems it. A mindful approach of paying attention to all of life’s details. Or said another way, the practice of thoughtful attention to what, how, and where time, aka energy, is allocated. In many scenarios it’s a reminder of or a reaction to the hypnotic attempt social media, entertainment, and marketing make at stealing one’s energy. I consider it the ultimate tour de resistance in order to ensure space and freedom remains in the capacity of one’s being.
Reddit, another wild frontier all its own, catalogs a range of interesting takes. ‘There’s hours of high definition footage of jellyfish on YouTube, just make sure you have an ad blocker,’ was one suggestion on how one can manage slow living in a fast paced world.
‘Ha, that’s funny’, I chuckled, recalling the times I visited the Monterey Bay Aquarium. The dark cavernous room with all the jellies aglow from the black light installation was, by far, my favorite exhibit. All the different shapes, colors, and sizes softly and amorphously adrift. I was entranced by how moving could be so effortless. And I’d have to agree. It did, instantaneously provide a deep internal sense of slowing down.
Within these same forums I noticed how slow living became muddled with privilege or wealth. A socially interesting insight, but one that still surprised me. A simple or slow lifestyle probably has the lowest barriers to entry out of any lifestyle for people of all walks of life. It’s not about buying a particular thing. It’s an approach to being in life. Having an ardent willingness to pay attention, living below one’s means, and being conscious of the consumption behemoth and not dictated by it, which can lead to less materialism, less complications, and less comparisons is something anyone can choose.
This may sound terribly bucolic or borderline maddening. I know it’s not for everyone. But here I am now wondering how I can relish moments like this more and more. Stretch time and space and linger in what peace I’ve come to treasure from solitude.
How do you imagine your perfect day of solitude?
Yours, Erin
*At this moment I’m in a bustling metropolis with some of my closest friends who have called this beautiful city home for the last eight years. Amsterdam is worlds away from Albuquerque, and I’m loving every minute of it.
I’m also working on some behind the scenes business ideas for the upcoming year. I’ll make sure to share more as details crystalize in the coming months. In the meantime have a great day!